The alarm went off at six o’clock. It had an insidiously annoying tone which went right through your head and woke you up in a few seconds. Still very drowsy with sleep she groped around under her pillows and finding her iPod hit ‘snooze’. The ringing stopped and in the silence that ensued she vaguely heard the sound of birds tripping over the highest notes with unimaginable ease, making impossibly intricate, yet somehow simple melodies. She turned and hugged a pillow, pulling the warm quilt tight around her, snuggling down deeper in its familiar warmth. Shifting sunshine through the glass balcony door beside her bed fell on her cheek, leaving traces of warmth, a peachy smudge. She thought of him. A happy smile brightened the peachy smudge as she unconsciously whispered his name, savoring the sound.
Suddenly she remembered. She opened her eyes. She struggled to breathe. The pain she felt was as if though someone held her ribs in a vice which tightened, splintering bones, puncturing her lungs.
‘This isn’t working out…I’m just not happy with you…I want to end this…’
How she regretted those careless words contained in the impulsive text she sent him the night before! She blinked hard, kidding herself that she wouldn’t miss him. A tear escaped. She sat up in bed, her head throbbing. Suddenly the sunshine seemed cold and indifferent, the quilt suffocating.
I’d rather be a little pissed off at your seemingly indifferent ways, a little discontent at being left alone than being completely miserable by not having you as my very own.
She realized that she liked him way more than she had thought she did.
Christina De Silva
25 July 2009
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